Not So Merry Christmas

As I sit and sluggishly prepare myself for a rather forgetful Christmas in Delhi this year, I’m forced to wonder “what the fuck went wrong?”, “Christmas without the family?” I mean just 2 months back (October) I was happily unwrapping my Christmas tree, had a great time decorating it, and was already listening to my favorite Christmas songs. Read: NSYNC – Home for Christmas (Hands down the best Christmas Album)

how did I get from there to here?

I was so excited (always am) with the prospect of meeting my family and spending quality time with them. Now with Christmas just 3 days away all the excitement has more or less died. Christmas songs irritate the shit out of me and to be honest I really feel like packing up the tree and bury it somewhere never to see the light of day. Yes I said it!

After quite an eventful year, where I and my family have gone through some of the most traumatic experiences, it would have made sense for a happy ending but looks like it not to be. Let’s have a look at what 2013 had to offer.

To start with I have missed my flights more times than I can remember (started with missing my flight home for Christmas last year).

·         I was going to write about the dream job I had to reject, but I’m very happy where I am so let’s skip to the third.

·         I lost a very close friend, a brother and an ex boss in Pranay. We met on a Saturday night and planned to go out for dinner on Monday and he passed away that very Monday.

·         Our cook who had been with us for close to 10 years brutally murders our Driver (RIP and God bless his soul) in Delhi. Now this is the kind of shit you watch in movies and read about in crime magazines, never expecting it would happen to you. All my siblings were convinced our house was haunted and so we had to shift out of our beautiful bungalow to an apartment in Vasant Kunj.

·         This shift in address meant that I now had to travel a grueling 45 kilometers everyday to work. That’s 2 hours going and 2 coming home.

·         Endless nightmares about the murder and strange occurrences that always seem to happen around 4 am (time of the murder) coupled with my high blood pressure sent me into depression. The solution – Meet a shrink! More pills for anxiety, depression, sleeping pills, BP pills etc. but I’m glad to say that as of December I’m out of all medication except for the BP. lets move on this subject is way too depressing.

·         Then comes the election. The endless hours and months of strategizing our campaign, designing websites, organizing events and yes the TVCs (My uncle is the president of MPC – Mizoram Peoples Conference). I made 2 really nice TVCs hoping people would connect with the problem of bad roads and bad electricity. But then yet again all these did not translate to votes and our party the MDA (MNF and MPC) got 7 seats out of 40 and congress as always taking absolute majority.

and 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tpBmD6w9_4k

website link: http://mizorampeoplesconference.com/

·         Losing an election is like getting your heart ripped off, because of the time and energy you spend on it, needless to say the money that goes to waste and the sacrifices that you make. It still hurts like yesterday so I won’t go any further. 

·         Because of the many holidays that I’ve taken this year for the Murder, the Depression and the Election Campaign etc. I dint have the balls to apply for more leave to go home for Christmas and partially because of the excessively ridiculous flight rates.

·         So I’m more or less forced to spend this Christmas here in Delhi with my buddy Joe. And to make things worse we don’t have girlfriends. Not that were looking out but you know, its winter, its cold at night and alcohol can only warm you so much and ummm… come on, it’s Christmas time! Spread the love? No love? Only seeds? Lol J/k. (Sometimes I don’t even know why I say the things I say).

Neway I shall count my blessings another day, for now I’m an angry man lashing out at the world because ummm… the Grinch stole my Christmas! That bastard!

So here's my Christmas plan. Drink to my hearts content and pass out early. Maybe watch the Arsenal vs Chelsea match, which I doubt we'll win given the recent or rather usual December sluggishness in form. but hell even if we lose, it gives me more reason to mourn our loss with another round of drinks. Maybe that's what being a true blue means, a blue December. I hate Christmas!

                                                                               but

                                                             Merry Christmas everyone! 

My Car My Music...

Ever wondered what your favorite place is? I asked a few people and they gave me some pretty vague answers, while there were a few that didn't even have a favorite place some had pretty interesting answers. One person said the toilet, coz that was the only place he found peace and quiet. (I can just imaging him stressed out and sitting on the commode). One person said the balcony of his house and the rest said their bed room. One person said the kitchen, as cooking releases her stress.

Well For me it’s my Car!I drive a not too fancy Ford Fusion which I bought about 4 years ago and I love the engine and power, but a it's a gas guzzler. You would not believe the amount I spend on Gas (Petrol) every month, about 15k yes you read it right 15 thousand Fucking Rupees, that's 300 $ for you Americans. But regardless of this I still Love my Car. 

Since I spend almost close to 4 hours commuting to and from work, my car is my favorite place in the whole wide world. *Bragging Alert: Which is why I spent a lot of money on my music system in my car so far it’s come close to 60k. I know a lot of people spend more than I do, but this is all I can afford to right now. All in all there's a total of 9 speakers in my car :-)

Why you ask? Well its because I love my music and its the only place where I can Max out to Pantera, Megadeth, Avenged Sevenfold etc. or maybe Backstreet boys and the likes of them, who knows...lol

I admit I do listen to all of them. Yes from the likes of the bands mentioned above to Jackson Browne, The Coors, 2 Pac, Danger Danger, Rick Price I could go on forever.

Now think of this this way if a grown ass man like me gets in the zone (Lungleng) and you start blasting Rick Prices' "Heaven Knows" or "Too Serious too Soon" by Gareth Gates, and you're singing your heart out holding a torch light as a makeshift microphone, your folks are probably gonna question your mental health. Then again if you start blasting "I'm Broken" by Pantera or "Last Resort" by Papa Roach they start labeling you as a rebel. And they start yelling turn than damn volume down! 

Which is why I spent so much on my car stereo just so I get to listen to the rock/metal songs I want as loud as I want to, or sing along to my KC&JOJO, Backstreet Boys track without embarrassing myself . And screw you I know you all secretly know their songs too!

So here's the hardware setup:

For my stereo I bought a humble JVC KW-R600BT Series, it was the cheapest of the 2 din lot so I just got it, No questions asked. 

For my front door speakers I had bought pioneers speakers with tweeters (non component) and was not satisfied with it so I switched it to a more powerful JBL GTO609C Series. And these fuckers are loud as hell :-)

For my rear door speakers I had Sony and wasn't satisfied with it either, so I switched that it again to JBL GTO 949 400 watt and a modest JBL GT6-s266 220 watt Speakers on the back tray.

Rear Door Speakers

Rear Tray Speakers

Nothing kicks ass more that Kicker so for my woofers I decided to get the Kicker PT8 Active Subwoofer 8".  These may look small but they pump the bass up to unprecedented levels. Once I bent over and sat on my Kicker Woofer and played "Down with the sickness" By Disturbed and it actually felt like someone was kicking my ass. If i had sat through the song I'd have surely had a sore ass!

Now nothing would be complete without an amplifier to bring all these bad boys together. So since I was really broke by the time I had to buy an Amplifier, I chose the 4 Channel Kenwood KAC-7005PS. And boy am I Pleased with this beauty, my only complain is that it really only starts kicking in when the volume is above 9.

And finally for the finishing touch i bought the JVC Bluetooth Adapter just to make life easier.

(And that is how my car looks like. iPhone 5 camera sucks monkey balls in low light.)

Now you pump the volume up to 25 and listen to Pantera your balls start bouncing to the beat of the drums. One time I played a song so loud the girl sitting next to me's bra strap ripped open (true story). She was like Damn your car is loud, I pulled a smirk and said that how I roll babe! and woke up!

And what really annoys me is when people insist in playing their songs in my car! Damnit its my Car My Music My Rules. If you request to play your music in my car you are automatically blacklisted and branded a communist! that's it Period!

Anyway I had nothing better today that why this post came up! Have a great day
P.s. +Mami Pautu is a Communist

Well after a heavy night of drinking, I woke up early and hungover and bored as hell as everyone else were still sleeping so, I decided to go out and upgrade my car speakers yet again, :-)

I ditched my old JBL tray speakers and installed the Rockfort Fosgate 300 watt Speakers on the tray and also added 2 more tweeters on the door panel. Now that's a whooping 11 speakers in my car. I Challenge anyone who can get a louder sound than me!

iPhone 5 Review from a Newbie

Well it’s been about a month since I got my iPhone5! What do ya know a BB boy switches to an iphone5.
For about a good 2 months I did my research, got a few advices from friends all fanboys id say, HTC One is the shizzz, Nokia Lumia is the best, an iphone is an iPhone, Samsung Galaxy 4 is the mother of all Smartphones…bla bla bla. But somehow my mind was on the Blackberry Z10, I did all kinds of research on it, compared it to the iPhone 5 and S4 and came very close in features and even exceeded others in specs and power. I knew it in my heart that it was the one for me or maybe an extension of me.

So instead of me having to buy it and if you have been following my blogs I have a very wonderful aunt who would do anything for me, so my aunt decided she would buy me one. So she calls me up at about 7 in the pm while I was still at work and I tell her I want the Blackberry Z10 and nothing else, I had even updated my Facebook status with a “Z10 it is”. After a about 20 minutes she calls me back saying  the sales man doesn’t want to sell her the Blackberry Z10 and that she got me the iPhone5 instead! I was like What the Fudge! How can the fuckin salesman refuse to sell a product to someone who wants to buy it!

Anyhow I went home half excited had to get my sim cut to yet another apple fiasco nano size. Activating it took a while, the only positive about my iPhone5 so far for me was that I could talk to my sister in US and all my other siblings for free over text and face time. Here’s why I don’t think too highly of the phone. Well it’s because I have an iPod touch and as useless as I think it is I didn’t see much of a difference between besides the fact that it was faster and the camera was better.

Now here’s what I think of the iPhone5

1. sucks monkey balls without internet or 3G (I use Aircel so there u go I have 2G and my iPhone5 sucks monkey balls)
2. You can’t customize your ringtone to your fav MP3. They told me you had to down load an app to do that so I did and still haven’t figured how to make my Papa Roach song my ring tone.
3. Almost all iPhone users use the default right tone and it’s so annoying when one phone rings and everyone takes out their phone to check if it’s theirs. But there’s hope if you’re not satisfied with the 20 odd default ringtones offered by default YOU CAN ALWAYS BUY THEM FROM THE ITUNES STORE! WOW
4. And apparently the first thing I want to do was text my sister in the US saying I got a new iPhone5, so I texted her saying “guess what I got an iPhone5 …” (yes there was no smiley by default in iPhone5) so I had to go cave man shit and do the :-) . So I asked around and yet again I had to download an app for smileys
5. What fucked my fuse was when I realized you can’t send songs on whatsapp to your friends! It’s locked.
6. They said the keypad was the smartest on the market and boy are they wrong; the auto correct is as dumb as a 2 headed blonde's maybe 3. I had fight with my buddy and I was so mad I wanted to type fuck you and mr. auto correct corrected it to Duck you!  
7. Bottom line - You need constant internet and you need to download an app for everything to enjoy your iPhone5.
8. What’s good about the phone is the touch and retina display. So far nothing seems to even come close to it.
9. Siri is always fun to hang with and ask dumb questions to. The other day I asked her Siri would you kiss me? She answered why would I want to do that? I asked again and she replied I’d rather not say.
10. Tons of apps to download and battery gives me about 10 hours on full charge.
11.  It can’t really multitask like the Blackberry Z10 or the Galaxy S4 but it can manage.
12. The camera is awesome both front and back but falls behind in low light conditions I don’t think anyone can beat the Nokia Lumia phone cameras. iPhone5’s pictures in low light tend to get grainy with a lot of noise.
13.   Apple really needs to change the UI, it’s getting boring oh so boring! I checked out leaked pictures of the IOS7 and it looks colorful but nothing new again.

I don't see anything that will entice me to switch from my iPhone 5 to the ohhh soooo wonderful iPhone 5 S. If you do bravo you are truly one of a kind.

In the end of it all I’m still a blackberry boy at heart I miss the keypad mostly, the BB hub and the red blinking light when you get messages or mails. All in all I think the iPhone5 is a solid phone feels heavy, looks great and feel like a genuine premium product. But unless they come up with a cheaper version of it soon and with apple stocks going down they might not be able to maintain the high and mighty status they currently enjoy.

In all honesty it's an awesome phone but i just don't know what to do with it yet. I’m still learning and beginning to understand my phone, I don’t love it yet but I like it for now and hopefully I’ll learn to love it. But I will always miss my blackberry!

And here are a few pics taken from my iPhone 5.

Letters to Juliet

Dear Juliet,

As I look back over my shoulder and contemplate on the time that has passed since we went our separate ways, I wonder if we have found what we set out to find. Did we not say life would be better if
I went north and you went south? In the course of your journey you have found religion and I have lost one, 
I have lived the world you left to the fullest and found no satisfaction, I only hope that you have fared better.

How much more different could our paths and lives be than this? But I have begun to realize that try as we may we could never fight the laws of nature. How welcoming for a change.

And I find it most striking that it is the same situation that drove us apart that has brought you back into my life. What is it about death that connects us? Could it be that we were meant to be together? 
My mind is forced to wonder, if it is a situation as such that has brought us back together, could it be that our next parting be when death do us part? Could our story finally be told as the rose that grew from concrete? I can only hope.

During our years apart, I held on to the greatest gift known to humanity ‘Hope’, but yet it gave me no relief, for in contrast like the dark side of the moon, I realized that hope as they say is the worst of all evils, for it prolongs the torment of man! What of our beautiful memories? I would ask myself. But as short lived as the happiness they bring, memories they always have such sad endings.

Every sad ending I have recently learned, starts with a new beginning. And what welcome timing than now that you decided to reveal yourself like the dawn of a moonless night.

Juliet, our story has but yet again just begun to unfold, and it is with unrivaled enthusiasm and promise that look towards tomorrow and its kin.

Always,

The Premonition!

She comes to me in my dreams. Like a siren, softly humming my song, 

she lures me away from my insipid reality, to a world of sinful pleasures. Dare I say no?

No man could resist, no chain can hold back; though I have tried, they break like feeble clay. 

You have no face, no voice, no form to feel or touch, yet I fall helplessly in love. Why are you here? 

Never saying my name, I hear you ever so clearly. Walking gracefully naked, yet my eyes fail to see through the nakedness, like the spirits themselves were covering you. What do you want from me?

You shine bright in my dreams, but only come to me in the dark of the night. Who are you?

Needle in my Ass!

For guys in their early 30’s there’s a lot of questions in their minds they need answers to, or need to figure out, like – am I in the right direction in terms of career? Am I earning enough? Is my lifestyle healthy? Do I need to start investing? Am I saving enough? Etc. but the most irritating question we have to deal with, which we don’t ask ourselves (at least I don’t) is one that is most personal, but everyone seems to have an opinion or a say in it, is -When are you getting married?

For the past few days I've been comparing the 2 lives: a single life and a married life. Just to see the differences between the two and if I would be willing to make the sacrifices that comes with getting married. The way this goes is I look at my life and the lives of some of my married friends and see the difference.

Now I’m as single as they come, no emotional attachment to anyone whatsoever. I have a decent income, a little on the fluffy side when it comes to physical stature but never the less a very happy man. I basically do whatever I want, when I want and have lived most of my life that way and I like it just the way it is. Now why would I ever want to give this up?

The Sacrifice:

A married life mean no more FIFA nights with the boys. No more crashing random parties. It means I can’t randomly call up females in the middle of the night when I’m in the zone. No more partying till 6 or 7 in the morning. No more crashing at a friend’s place whenever. No more sleeping till 3 in the afternoon on a weekend and definitely no staying up till 3 or 4 am watching tv. It means I won’t be able to jam in my room to my favorite Megadeth tracks with my guitar amps pumped to a max. No more Smoking in the bedroom (maybe living room who knows). What if I had to do household chores for sex? Picture me washing clothes, doing the dishes, sweeping the floor? What nightmare, what disaster befalls a married man!

I’m sure that under the right circumstances and for the right person I may be willing to give these up, but these right circumstances come far and few in between.

What if you get married to the wrong person? It means you’re stuck to a life of compromises after another. I don’t want to wake up every day and look at my wife and think to myself ‘what a bitch!’. And they say you can learn to love someone! For me that’s just ridiculous, it’s like a needle stuck in your ass and the doctor says you’ll learn to live with it, I don’t want to live with a pain in my ass. Similarly why would I ever want to learn to love my wife? I would rather love the person first before she becomes my wife.

Anyway what I’m really trying to say is that yes I do understand that time is not on our side, we age, we sag, we wrinkle, get white hair and as fate would have it, it becomes easier to get a new job than it is to have a girlfriend. But, until and unless someone has found the right person to spend the rest of his life with, why pressure him/ her?

And maybe in the time to come, I will get tired of this lifestyle, this freedom and long to be tied down like an old faithful pet, but until then if you have a problem with my awesome single life...

&

Leave Me Alone!

Love Was it...?

When I look back I on my younger days I realized there were always girls who we could so easily fall in love (read: infatuated) with. I mean we’d look at some of the girls and we’d just know that that person had to be ours. We’d write love letters, make mixed tapes, poems and send it to them and sooner or later (more often than none) we would end up dating, even if it was only for a week or a month, but there was always someone there as a girlfriend.

And yes sometimes we made complete fools of ourselves in the process, but it really didn’t matter I guess back then. I remember in my senior high in Mount Carmel, I was head over heels for a girl named Toshila (ali) who I was after for 2 damn years but never got lol.  She was and still is one of the most beautiful girl I have ever met, she was cool, she loved Megadeth (that’s 100 point bonus right there), and she was always so nice to talk to.

I remember the first time I saw her was in my first Home Science class (Yes I took Home Science). I felt an explosion in my heart as I saw her walk in, I swear everything was in slow-motion in my eyes, just like in the movies, everyone else blurred out and all I saw clearly was her. Even though I was a metal head, I can assure you the music that was playing on my mind was not that of Megadeth but ‘Bed and Breakfast – If you were mine’.  (Now that’s what you call a love struck MOFO)

So after class I decided I had to talk to her, but I didn’t know what to say. So as I was standing there thinking of what to say, I saw her walking towards the girls hostel. Scared that I might not get to talk to her, I walked up and said “Hi, can I ask you a question? When ma’am said bring chicken tomorrow did she mean a live chicken or a dead one?” she laughed and I felt so stupid, but she very politely explained what had to be brought and what we were going to do in class. I walked away slapping myself thinking “of all the things… I had to ask her that question? Fuck, she probably thinks I’m a retard, fuckin live chicken or a dead one arghhhh….” Then after a few days I found out my best buddy Amit was in love with her too and of all the people he asked me to help him get her! Aaaaaahhh the stories I used to tell him, of how I spoke to her for him and what she said etc. lol fun times.

Dating 101

Lately a few fellow bloggers have been blogging about Dating and all the rules that entail this event. I found it rather interesting to hear from a man’s point of view as described by Michael Njldst (Rules of Engagement) and also from the feminine point of view from Giselle Khiangte (Dating Tips for Mizo Guys) So I decided I should write one myself from a more matured point of view (I’d like to believe I've been in the game longerJ) plus I have few points that I’d like to add to their already detailed write up.

• If it’s a dinner date, dress appropriately! Look presentable, and smell good (so so important). This is not only for yourself but it’s a way of complimenting your date. It makes her feel important when you take time to dress up for the occasion. You may be an emo kid or a rap star for all she cares but if it’s a proper dinner date, look presentable. Trust me she will be impressed.
• I really don’t care how far she stays, even if you don’t have a car, pick her up! Nothing sounds as cheap for a guy to say as “ok, I see you at the spot”. Remember your first date is not about you it’s about her, so make her feel special and taken care of. When you go to pick her up, don’t just sit in your car when she comes out of the house and blurt out “Hop in”, be a gentleman, get the fuck out, compliment her on how beautiful she looks, open the door for her and let her in.
• It’s always a good idea to surprise a woman on your first date. How do you do that? Well a little bit of research will do the trick. Ask her friends what her favorite restaurant is, what her favorite food is, find out her favorite movie, book, you name it, find them all out. But when you do strike a conversation with her don’t bring all her favorites out first, give it a surprise entry. You constantly talking about her favorite everything will give you away in no time at all, so plan it well.
• When she gets in the car she’ll probably ask you, "So, where are we going?" (time to pull out that smirk on your face) tell her “there’s this awesome little restaurant called …….(whatever her favorite restaurant’s name is) I know that serves really good Italian/Korean/ Japanese/ Indian (whatever her favorite is) food, and I think you'll love it”. You have successfully impressed her by 30%! Now it’s time for you to shut up and listen to things you already know like how it’s her favorite restaurant and about her first time there etc. etc.
• Make sure you have made due reservations, nothing worse than waiting for a table outside all decked up. No, her second favorite restaurant wont do, so make due reservations.
• At the table be polite, but confident not over confident. At one point or another a conversation about ex’s will come out, be smart and don’t go telling her about how you met and how the bitch fucked your life up with all the dramatic details. Be diplomatic about it, tell her she was a nice girl and that it just didn’t work out. She’ll see from the hurt in your eyes and figure things out for herself. And please don’t go Sherlock on her about her ex either, you’re there together because you’re both looking to move on.
• Make sure you find a way to make her laugh, nothing breaks the uncomfortable first few minutes of a first date than a good laugh. And please don’t drink like your life depended on it, control your drinks.
• Pay the Bill. She might want to chip in but you should pay the bill. If you have asked a girl out for a date, pay the bill. Maybe its just me but I think the guy should always pay the bill.
• After dinner I suggest you take her for ice-cream and a short walk. And if she insists on paying for the ice-cream let her. Trust me, a short walk or stroll after dinner does wonders.
• Don’t try to be a Romeo on the first date and be too frisky, maintain your composure, distance but most of all show her that you respect her, enjoyed yourself and thank her for the wonderful night, after you've dropped her.
• Once you've reached home, don’t go texting her straight away. Wait for a while, give her time to recollect the night’s incidents, time to tell her friends about you and the date. And right before you hit the sack, text her saying how you had a wonderful time with her and wish her good night.
• If she doesn't call you or text you in a weeks time, don't bombard her with texts and calls, move on. Just wank it off shes not interested. 

There you go dating 101. 

Zakster learn how to fucking write copy

“Zakster what is this crap you just sent me”

Me: It’s the copy for the new ad

“Zakster learn how to fucking write copy”

“Zackster send me the branding options”

Me: Sent

“Zakster: Fuck all branding, give me 10 more”

“Zakster are you done with the copy check”

Me: Yup, went through it twice

“Do I have to go through it?”

Me: Nope

“Zakster I’m going to go through it anyway and for every error I find you owe me a bottle of beer”

Me: Ok cool but you won’t find any!

After 15 minutes

“Zakster you owe me 26 bottles of beer!”

1:30 Am: “Zakster I’m going home, but you have to stay. @#$% (client name) wants a brochure and leaflet for the new product by tomorrow morning. Write the copy and supervise the design and layout. Call me if you need help but don’t expect me to come to office. Handle it!

Me: “Are you serious, I’m just an intern, dude I don’t think I can do it. I've never written a whole brochure before?”

“Zackster listen, it’s now or never, I know you can do it. Like I said call me if you need help”

Do I need to say more? He was my boss! Made me rewrite thousands of headlines, concepts and copy. And made me clock over a million hours of copy check. Yeah, I had the honor of working with a Maverick! The coolest and most enigmatic man I've ever met. Last week, before he passed away we met at a friend’s bachelor’s party and I asked him, dude I just realized over the time we worked together, we had many interns some of whom you placed under me and you always let them go home on time, but you never let me go home on time even as an intern. Why man? “Hahahahaha Zackster it was fun having you around!” 

Even after I left MRM we always kept in touch, he would often come to my place for dinner or lunch and I go to his house for dinner and drinks. We spoke over the phone every once in a while, played Scrabble on facebook (I could never beat him, and we still have a game half played which I guess we’ll never finish), meet up at concerts and have a ball of a time. Pranay was one of, if not the most wonderful person I've ever met.

After a decent string of conversations you’d be forced to think he was a walking encyclopedia. You name a subject from Philosophy,Photography, music, literature, culture to marketing he knew them all, he was the most well read man I’ve ever met. Just don’t get him started on the existence of God, Pink Floyd or which Rock band has the best album cover (Grateful Dead of course) then it becomes an endless affair.

One moment I remember most fondly of him was a time we were discussing about racism at work. I was in one of those full on, in the zone moments, talking about how we as North Eastern's were oppressed and looked down upon, and narrating my experiences etc. etc. and after a while he calmly said “Zakster learn how to be Indian first before you complain, then you’ll understand things better”. I realized then that I’d never really tried to be Indian all my life, all I expected was for other to accept me the way I am, without ever trying to understand their side and culture. And I’m glad to say that I've never felt more Indian since and the angry bitter me has given way to a better understanding calmer me. 

There are not many people I respect and look up to, and Pranay was definitely one of the few. He was a boss, a leader, a confidant and a friend but most of all a brother from another mother (I know clichéd but its true). Always ready to go out of his way to help you. I was mad as hell when Titu a colleague called me up saying he has passed away, I was devastated and felt betrayed. I kept cussing away on my way to the hospital, because we had made plans just 2 days before to meet up the following Sunday for dinner and drinks at North East Kitchen Haus Khas. And we spoke about going for a trekking trip, he told me that I was too fat and that he was gonna get me fit by taking me for a trek.

Life is fragile, and we end up losing the people we love most when we least expect it, I didn't see Pranay's  death coming. I wish I did, but that's how life is as hard as it is to accept. And memories no matter how good, they always have such sad endings. After losing 4 of my best and closest friends now, I feel like every relationship should be treated with an unexpected expiry date, that way when they leave us or for that matter when we leave them, it doesn't hurt too much and doesn't come as a surprise. 

I will miss you Pranay! And I promise you I will go for a trek, roll up a J and light up one at the peak for you. You will never be forgotten. Rest In Peace Brother!

And let it be known from 30 April 2013 the Nickname Zakster is officially retired!

Here are a few pictures:

 This is Titu, Me and Pranay: The Three Musketeers 

And this would be me Showing off my Salman Khan Ohoh Jaane jaana dance moves

And finally Pranay showing us his moves on the dance floor.

Yeah we know where you're going buddy, we'll miss you!

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                                 The large headphones lie on the table. But the music’s changed.

The unwieldy crop of hair. The twinkling, almost mischievous eyes. And the slumbering walk that would turn into a trot with the sound of music. You were a soldier ready to take it on the chin and equally adept at giving it back. You knew how to marshall your troops and you knew how to turn the long nights into the best time to get down to work. Now it’s time to get the angels to sing louder, sing better.RIP

By Rahul Mathur

Things that annoy me

• Mipa muza rul deuh bun hi
• Nula zoi hmel deuh kal muang deuh
• Mipa sam khuih reng/ darthlalang a in en reng
• Pitar/putar kal chak deuh
• Mipa hnar hmul sei deuh
• Motor nei vea ti fai peih si lo, bal deuha khalh reng hi
• Vai ho kong zim ngam lo lutuk hi ka ning em em boka
• Nula chhelo deuh chhas nei
• Mipa zoi toka handshake thin hi an tenom ka ti boka
• Mipa ke tin zuah sei

A tok viau in ka hria. Ka lung a leng!

Want a Girlfriend? A job? Lots of female friends? Here's how.

Hi, I don’t mean to impose but you smell really good, what’s the name of the perfume you’re wearing?

Listen to my advice and these lines could very well fall on your ears too. I have noticed many men are not very particular about what they smell like. Sure a nice roll on or a deo might do the trick but, real men (read Gentlemen) need to go beyond that and put on some perfume. Besides the psychological effects of perfume, wearing perfume shows 2 things about you: 1. It shows you have class 2. It shows you’re serious about personal hygiene.

Now I’m not saying Deodorants are bad, but I suggest you use these only when you’re out playing or for the gym. For the serious parts of life you need perfume! Like for work, college or for dates and other ceremonious occasions perfume is a must (Especially dates). Imagine your to going out on a date with a hot girl, you take a nice long shower, shave and put on some aftershave, brush your teeth, style your hair, apply some body cream, pick out the nicely ironed shirt, wear your pants and shoes, then finally finish it off with a wild spray of deodorant? No, you finish it off with perfume, behind the ears, on the wrist and 2 sprays on the shirt. 

Women love men who smell good. You may not be all that handsome or whatever it doesn’t matter, women are psychologically attracted to men who smell good. They want to be near them, sit with them coz the fragrance makes them happy (Scientifically proven fact). And especially if you have a signature fragrance, that fragrance becomes a trigger of your memory and no matter where they are, every time they get a whiff of that perfume they will be reminded of you. I’ve had girls call me up all the way from down south, up north, east even beyond international borders saying how at a party someone was wearing the perfume I used to wear and it reminded them of me and go on to say how much they miss me J. You will also get the occasional “ka kor ah I perfume rim ala nam reng” call. The possibilities are endless trust me. 

I think every man should have at least 3 perfumes: 1. Summer wear 2. Winter wear and 3. Date wear.
For summer the perfume needs to be fresh and light. I recommend the 212, Azzaro Chrome, Loewe Solo, Bvlgari Aqva, Pierre Cardin and maybe Cool Water you can also check out Kenzo Pour Homme.  Winter perfumes can be warmer and muskier. And for these I recommend 212 VIP, Paco Robanne One Million, Dolce & Gabbana The One (the original The One not the new one), Thierry Mugler A*Men, Carolina Herrera CH, Glivenchy Gentleman and if you’re short on cash Aigner Black. Now for the Date wear you have to make it extra special, like Carolina Herrera for this like 212 sexy for men and CH, but for the very special date I go with Narciso Rodriguez for him. If you have some serious cash to spill you can go for Thierry Mugler A*Men pure malt.

But always remember what smells good on someone might not smell as well on you so always try out perfumes personally before you buy them. I usually go to shops and try a few ones every now and then, see how my skin reacts to the perfume and how long it lasts on me then later go online and buy it.

Above all this it’s important you remember that if you smell good you will feel good, it will also give you confidence, make you feel fresh and likeable. I have never met a person that smells good that I don’t feel like talking to. If you smell good you have my attention and I think that applies to everyone. The power of perfumes and smelling good is in that fact that in Europe and America you cannot wear perfumes to a job interview, because it’s been said that the smell can induce the mind to like the candidate giving an unfair advantage. But since we don’t have that rule in India, spray away and congratulations on the new job. 

Here are a few of my babies. Of all these the most precious is the small bottle on the extreme right. This bad boy is pure perfume oil all the way from Egypt, a gift from my BFF Christina Colney (a humming bird told me shes giving me one more perfume as a birthday gift). 

Front Row: Cool Water, For Him, CH, The One, Pierre Cardin, Aigner Black, Perfume Oil.

Back Row: 212 VIP, 212

For women, so far I think I'm in love with 4 perfumes, Narciso Rodriguez for her, Carolina Herrera CH, Chanel Chance and my personal Fav again thanks to Christina 212 Sexy for women. I remember the first time she wore it, we went to a party together and I didn't even dance I just sat next to her, coz she smelled soo damn good. That's how powerful perfumes can be, the smell tamed a party animal like me. 

Birthday Blues!

It’s that time of the year again. The time of the year I used to love but now hate! Yes, my birthday is coming up next week and God I wish this week would never end. As if turning 30 was not bad enough last year, I realized nothings worse than turning 31 on a Monday. So as a sign of protest against my ageing I decided to grow my sideburns and beard.

But the best part is that I’m not as depressed as I was last year, just a lil uninspired because like the year before, I have so many questions I need answers to like: How do you welcome and unwelcome age? Do I throw a kick ass party, get effin sloshed or comb my beard light a J and meditate on the coming of the age? Do I buy myself a nice bottle of perfume or maybe a new shoe? Or should I buy myself both? Xvideos or Xhamster? How long will it take for my sideburns and beard to be 5 inches long on all sides? Should I change my hairstyle to make me look more professional at work? Why does my blackberry hang so much? If my blackberry had legs how long would they be? Should I get a new phone…Nexus 4 or iPhone5? Beckham looks so cool in briefs, should I switch from boxers to briefs too? Dotted or Rippled? Will Master Chief be the same without Cortana? Playstation 4 or the new Xbox? We went from Pamela Andersons Breasts to Kim Kardashians ass, what’s next? 

See these are just a few of the things that have been pressing my mind for quite a bit of time and until these are answered I don’t think I’ll ever have a peaceful birthday or life. I should have learned from last year when none of my questions were answered, that it’s pointless to ask these questions, but what the hell if I never ask I’ll never know. Hui ham, Ka lung a leng! 

Awesome ads

Advertising is a shady business to be in, we’re hated as much as we are loved. 

We make you buy things you don’t need, make you watch things you don’t need to see, we change your perception of beauty, and tell you you’re not good enough without you even knowing it. But we have also stopped wars, raised awareness about so many things you would have never known about, made you laugh and cry with joy.

Most times we over do it, but when we do get it right we leave you speechless. 

On that note, here are a few Advertisements that I feel are awesomely creative. The list is not in terms of ranking or creativity but just some random ads that just popped up in my head today.

1.       Axe – Susan Glenn

Most people didn’t get this Ad when it came out but for me this is the best Axe ad ever. For a long time I’ve been bitching about how deo ads look all the same, it’s always about an underdog spraying some cheap ass deo and all the girls run after him. WTF!!. I know sex sells but dammit. Then this little ad came along and brought a smile to my face.

 2.       Perrier – It’s Perfect, it’s Perrier and Morning in America

If you know anything about copywriting than these 2 ads are examples of perfection. A typical Hal Riney Ad.

3.    Procter & Gamble – Best Job

Procter & Gamble pulled a fast one on all of us with this one. The ad starts and you instantly know this is going to be one of those clichéd emotional ads that come up every once in a while. You have so many things you want to say is wrong with the ad but in the end, you’re like awwwww… I Miss my Mommy!

4.    Dixons - The Last Place you want to go

Reading this print ad still brings a smile to my face. this is just 1 of a series of 3 similar print ads judge for yourself.

5.    Dove - Dove is all you need to know about skin care

My Guru, the father of long copy - Neil French

And to think it took two years for the company to approve and release this. Just goes to show that companies don't always know whats best for them. (click on picture to enlarge)

6.    The Guardian - Three little pigs

This one caught me by surprise. Maybe one of the best ads to come out in 2012.

Epic Valentine’s Day Part 2 - Radio Ga Ga

OK truth be told I was about to go out on a ranting spree of my Valentine’s Day experiences so far, all very uninspiring but something special happened. It might not seem very special to most people but to me it was, so out with the ranting and in with this awesome experience, so here we go: (Please keep in mind that I'm sharing this experience at the risk of sounding excessively cheesy)

I usually never listen to radio anymore, but since I was hit by a truck last week I had to give my car to the service station for damage repairs and so I had to take the family car to work. We have a Ford Figo for a family car and you would all know it has a crappy sound system (no USB) and bad speakers (unlike my car which is pimped up). Anyway since I couldn't play all my favorite songs in my pen-drive  I decided to listen to the radio for a change and as I was driving along the RJ announced that they were having a Valentine’s Day contest where the listeners were asked to send their 100 word love note or poem to FM 94.3 and the winners would get an all expense paid dinner for 2. I thought to myself 'EPIC', free dinner? I’m in!

I reached office, opened my laptop and sent them an old note I had written for someone sometime back called Who Am I? Next thing I know the RJ calls me up saying Zakk you’ve won, I’m gonna give you a prize, who did you write it for etc. asked me for a few details and before I knew it I was live on air with that someone I had written it for. I was so nervous so was she, especially when she asked are you two married? I sheepishly answered ‘no, we used to date but not anymore’. But the RJ was rather inspiring when she went on to say “you guys should get back together, this is the loveliest note I've even read and I can feel the love in the air” etc.

It all happened so fast I can’t even remember in detail what we said and how we answered her questions. I tried very hard to maintain my composure but I think I just laughed or giggled the whole incident through. But I do remember one part where she asked “so ….. are you really scared of lizards?” and we both answered “Petrified” together lol. I thought that was really romantic in a way.

As the RJ explained what we had won, I realized they didn't really mean a thing. The gift voucher, the dinner etc. what I had really won was much better more valuable. I won an awesome Valentine’s Day experience for once. Initially it was embarrassing but after a while it becomes a surreal experience that brings a smile, and to know that this experience will always bring a smile every time I look back is priceless.