Friday, March 28, 2014

Sometimes...

I can feel the cold sensation of disinterest creeping up my mind. How can it be when only 9 and two thirds of an hour ago it was the warm feeling of contentment cascading through my soul?

Halfway between a quarter and a half mid life crisis, I somehow for the first time see myself as a third person. From the safety of a vantage point I watch myself looking at myself with complete contempt.

I see a man scarred with scars, dark dots and jagged lines and circles cloaked with a personality of a semi mad man part time drunk. The eclipse slowly but surely swallows his humanity as he slowly fades from existence.  

The beard, yes the beard is a mask, a façade just like his clothes hiding his scars. He looks like a dying man desperately living to die. A man abandoned by hope with extreme prejudice. 

1 comment:

Malsawmi Jacob said...

Buck up, buck up! Many of us feel like that sometimes. But see, the sun still rises every morning and the breeze still blows... Hope must never be allowed to die...
This is from one who has long passed the midlife crisis and is living (even if not kicking very hard) to tell the tale :)